Chapter 2 - The El Salvador Solution

The Kingdom of Palm Beachonia

The accompanying photo showed a cargo plane, hastily repainted with a cartoon pelican wearing sunglasses, stuffed with professors, civil servants, and one bewildered golden retriever who had apparently barked at the wrong campaign rally.

Chapter 2

The El Salvador Solution

One night, hunched over a cheeseburger in the White House, inspiration struck.

"We’ll deport them!" he cried, mouth full.

“We’ll start with deporting some MS-13 gangsters first as part of my immigration mandate and then move on to the ones we really want taken care of. All the bad ones. The fake news people. The comedians. The bad lawyers, maybe some judges, little kids with cancer. The fat generals. Send them all somewhere! Somewhere sweaty! And let’s not forget Alcatraz."

President Donald Trump then proposed reopening and rebuilding Alcatraz as a maximum-security federal penitentiary to house the "most ruthless and violent offenders" in America. This has sparked considerable debate and discussion, with various perspectiv…